Sunday, February 26, 2012

"Giving Up vs. Giving In"

This past Wednesday was Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent. I attended the mass service on campus at noon, and Fr. Curran (President of RU) performed the ceremony. I was really intrigued by his homily. He said that we often misunderstand the point of Lent, and we usually think it is all about giving up. We worry about what we will give up during Lent- soda, Facebook, using the elevator in Sedgwick, etc. However, it is actually about giving in to God and letting Him be the center of our lives. I was especially touched by this homily because I am the type of person that becomes easily upset when things go wrong, even when they are out of my control.

(The Ash Wednesday service that I attended. I can see myself in the very back lol. Photo credit to the Rockhurst University Marketing Department.)

I had been struggling to think of a physical thing I would give up during Lent, but this homily completely changed my thinking. I have decided instead of “giving up”, I will be “giving into God” by trusting in His plan for me. I will be making a conscious effort to surrender those things that upset me, especially when they are out of my control. The day before the Ash Wednesday service was a pretty rough day for me. I received a very low grade on a test. I take my grades very seriously, and I was incredibly upset by this grade, especially since I felt prepared for the exam. It was a very emotional experience for me, but Fr. Curran’s homily the next day really put things into perspective for me. I often find myself upset over things I can’t control, and sometimes it really affects my day. During Lent, I will be making a conscious effort to not let these types of things bother me.

I can think of countless examples about things in my life right now that upset me but are beyond my control. Since I am a senior, I was not able to participate in the NACA National Conference on behalf of SAB in Charlotte, NC. This is the first semester since my freshman year that I won’t be there, and I am so nostalgic about it. With my new Lenten attitude, however, I have been able to find peace with this. I may not be able to attend the event, but that gives four awesome, up-and-coming e-board members the chance to take in the experience. I have no doubt that they will do an awesome job, and I am so excited to hear all about the conference when they return later this week.

Tomorrow is my 22nd birthday, and I can’t help but feel like my life is flying by me. I have been reflecting on the past, and I feel very sentimental. With my new Lenten attitude in mind, I have let go of the uneasy feeling associated with the fact that I cannot slow down time. Instead, with God’s help, I can turn toward the future with a secure optimism, knowing that the best is truly yet to come. I know that the rest of the semester will be filled with some very exciting things. I can't wait to see what this semester (and beyond) has in store for me.

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